selfhelp | [Action/Written]

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[Billy has never thought of himself as one of those obsessive stalker boyfriends who needs to be attached at the hip to his significant other at all times. Really, he'd always figured they were pretty good about mutual space. A two-month separation with the potential of spending years in this place without seeing Teddy again is, however, apparently the trigger he'd needed to become one, so after one too many looks from Teddy - some patient, others not so much - he'd officially gotten himself banished from the apartment for the afternoon after too much worried lurking. Which is... not the greatest thing ever on a hot day like today, but ten minutes down the road he realizes that, yeah, he'd been a little ridiculous, either blowing off his responsibilities or dragging Teddy along for the ride. He's happy and eager to have Teddy here, but they'd lived separate lives at least half the time back home; no reason for that to not continue here as well.

It's just hard to let go after you've missed someone for that long.

Still, that's how he finds himself out and about for around five hours today, doing the following (in no particular order):

- a late lunch at Seventh Heaven
- searching around the library for comic books
- combat practice in the Battle Dome (with or without his trusty new teacher)

While at the library, a few sketches find their way into his journal, more or less like the following: this, this, and this. Some time afterwards, a scribbled message appears below.]

What are some good ways to deal with bad dreams?

[Once he's finished all his daily stuff, he'll be bringing groceries home around dinner time, in the hopes that he's allowed. Feel free to run into him at any time.]

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[He blushes slightly at the compliment, feeling suddenly self-conscious; it takes a lot of willpower not to cover the paper up. He'd just been doodling, it's not that great...]

Expand on it? Like how?

Well, there's going to be a mural project. Maybe you can help with that? [Although that's a cooperative effort, and not quite the same style of Billy's doodles.]

Or you can get the supplies, and do actual drawings instead of just sketches in your journal. You know, I do have experience as a curator. [Sort of. Considering how valuable Tony's art collection had been, Pepper thinks it counts.] We could probably even set up a display of your works down the line.

...I... wh... are you joking? A display, like- like I'm an artist or something? I'm nowhere near that level! That's what professionals do!

[Ohgodohgodohgodohgod]

No, I'm not joking. It'd really just be a matter of finding the space--and of getting the work together, of course.

[Aw, Billy. So shy and cute.] Well, if it'd make you feel more comfortable, it wouldn't have to be just you. I'm sure there are other artists in Luceti--huh.

[Pepper's smile starts to widen, her eyes brightening.]

You know, that's actually a really good idea.

An... art gallery, you mean?

[Well... it might be nice? Make Luceti kinda cultural or something.

But the idea of it featuring anything of his with the label of "art" is still mortifying.]

Exactly.

[Pepper's very keen on the idea now that it's in her head. The mural had gotten a fairly strong response, so maybe an art gallery would too.

Ah, but Billy's not getting off the hook so easily.]

I wouldn't suggest it unless I thought you were good, Billy. You really should think about it.

[Uh. Uh. Um. Well.

Crud.]

I've never... really thought about doing art for real. It was just a hobby.

Well, it still will be. It's not like I can offer to pay you.

Think about it? It might help you work out a few things if nothing else.

[Then a thought occurs...an important one.]

Just one favor? If you do anything of Tony as Iron Man, don't tell him. He's already looking for something of himself to hang in his workroom.

...What if it was something embarrassing? Could I display that?

[Because the wheels of evil comedy are turning in his head already. Assuming he actually does have to draw stuff for this thing, anyway. He has a feeling she might win this one though.]

[Okay, so Pepper grins at that.]

Technically you can put together whatever your heart desires--although I do reserve the right to refuse anything that lacks appropriate artistic merit. [Billy is a teenager, and they can be cruel.]

Just because I'm not looking to boost Tony's ego doesn't mean I want to deflate it either. He is my boyfriend.

Killjoy.

[He smiles, though; he can appreciate that, since he'd be unhappy if anyone painted Teddy in a bad light, too. It's just not a thing you do - or, if you do it, don't show their significant other.]

I'll think about it, though. The art in general, I mean.

And that makes you sound like Tony.

[That's one of the nice things about Pepper and Tony's relationship: being able to poke fun at one another. And yes, it falls neatly in line with the unspoken rule of I can make fun of him all I want. You can't.]

I really do hope so. It might help you feel a little less alone when you're by yourself.

[Oh man, ouch. Back home that would actually be an insult.]

I must look pretty pathetic right now.

[Except Pepper 1) is not from your home, 2) loves Tony, and 3) is teasing. Remember that Billy.]

Why do you say that?

Sitting around sulking like this because he asked for a few hours on his own? I was never this bad before. I spent two months on my own before he arrived and I was fine.

[Pepper gives Billy a sympathetic smile at that.]

You know, I didn't really cry when Tony disappeared--when he was kidnapped by terrorists, I mean. I was definitely terrified, and there were very bad days, but mostly I just focused on the job, and tried to keep things together.

But when they said they'd found him? I lost it. I honestly think that if it were physically possible to bawl my eyes out, I would have. Tony even noticed when he got off the plane. I had to make a crack about how I hated job hunting.

I think part of it was the relief, and part of it was realizing just how much I missed him. And that's before he and I were ever a couple. So if you look pathetic now, I had to look even worse then.

[Ah... that sounds familiar. The terrorist stuff is pretty ancient history for him now, but he remembers it; whether they were dating at the time or not doesn't even matter. How you feel about a person... how it feels to have them torn out of your life... how it feels to have them return... that's what really matters, in the end.]

I cried when I found Teddy. Twice, even.

[He understands.]

[Ancient history for Billy, just a few years for Pepper. But so long as he gets it; that's all Pepper wants.]

It'll get easier. Especially if Teddy doesn't make a habit of missing board meetings and other scheduled appointments.

Actually, he's pretty good at being on time. At least, as much as any teenager can be.

Right. No self-respecting teenager can be completely responsible. I'm sure you've got your share of bad habits too.

No doubt. Don't ask Teddy, he's probably got a list. At the very top, bold print, underlined, is "Can't stay out of trouble."

[Find him a super hero that can, is his defense.]

[Pepper can't. In fact, she lets out a short, humorless laugh when he says it. Guess what mental image just came to her mind?]

Then suddenly I have all the sympathy in the world for your boyfriend.

[Oops?]

And yet he's the one who'll fly between two warring alien clans in the middle of a battle when he's already injured.

Oh no. Don't. [And Pepper's face is in her hands, because really? She has it hard enough just worrying about Tony.]

You're all the same, aren't you? Being noble, putting yourselves in danger--giving the people who care about you heart attacks.

[Pepper laughs again, although it still sounds a little hopeless.] I understand why, I do. But I really don't want to hear about it any more than I have to. Please?

[That makes him pause, stopping to think about what he's saying now. He's still not used to talking about- well, anything to do with super heroes and whatnot with people who aren't in the same situation as him. No wonder she's getting stressed.

He offers up a weak, apologetic smile, trying to shift topics a little instead.]

My mom said kind of the same thing a while back. ...Sorry.

[action] wow the html broke weirdly on that one

[action] it couldn't handle all the scantily-clad Tony talk.

[action] now I wanna see tony do a booty dance

[action] ...Pepper would hurt his ego by laughing, probably.

[action] it's okay, she surely wouldn't be alone there

[action] no, but she is his girlfriend.

[action] but she's probably seen him do worse, too

[action] there's youtube videos of him doing worse.

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